I feel blech. Yucky and wierd in a way I have never felt before. The constant drone of helicopters over the neighborhood doesn't help either.

Shhhh. Don't tell Doug cause it makes his face turn purple, but I let Evan unroll the toilet tissue. I know it's wasteful, but it makes Evan so very happy. It's easy to clean up, too.

If you can lie still for stitches in your eyebrow, why do I have to wait until you are asleep to trim your fingernails? "Ow! You're hurting my nails."

There was a time when I never missed watching the Oscars. While it wasn't the spiritual experience that Westminster is, it was fun to try and guess who would win the awards. Yes, it was also about playing fashion police. "That dress is beautiful but why is he wearing that?" This year I have seen nothing that is nominated. nada. zip. shake your hand in a zero shape and then blow on your outstretched palm. If they had an awards show for cheesy children's programming I'd be all over it. " ...and the award for most tragic episode goes to...the one where the doll dies!"

Ringo Starr, George Carlin or Alec Baldwin?

Mommy is tired.

Evan would not sleep last night.

I am a Mombie.

I remember my parents letting me stay up past my bedtime if The Sound of Music or The Wizard of Oz was on the television. I'm letting my children stay up to watch War Games.

Baby Juggling Tour 2006 

Juggle the baby. 

This is just too funny. From Blogging Baby

Sarah text messaged early this morning as she was being evacuated from her school for a bomb threat. We sat at home and text messaged for a few hours before she sent the "everyone is checking out now" message. Doug went to the school and learned we had fallen for the old "everybody" trick. What to do? Check her out because lots of other parents were doing it? Be paranoid that the bomb squad missed something when they swept the school? Leave her at school? There is no parent training for bomb threats.

Those aren't Christmas lights on our house. Those are Girl Scout cookie lights.

Target sent me a temporary tattoo of the little target bullseye. Shouldn't they pay me if I'm going to be their billboard? What if I use the tattoo inappropriately? Will they sue me?

"On my next birfday, I'll be two!" "No, you'll be four." "No! I will be two!" I thought she wouldn't start that until after she turned 30.

Time to post Girl Scout cookie recipes again.

I am so peeved at our elementary school and the non-stop fundraising that I am going to sleep on it for a day before I write them a letter about how ridiculously out-of-control this has become. Poor, sweet Noah gets a big sales pitch about how great each and every fundraiser is and how easy it will be to sell the stuff-of-the-moment. He comes home all excited, tries so hard and fails miserably. I put my heart into his Boy Scout popcorn sale and Sarah's cookie sales but the school has pushed me too far. Just at Noah's elementary school this year we have had PTA capital campaign, book orders, book fair, school carnival, pancake breakfast, coupon books, pies, change jar collection and now magazines. Sadly, this won't be the last one this year. Elementary age children should not be asked to participate in more than two fundraisers each year and if the school is too stupid to realize that, maybe our over-bearing, big brother of a government needs to put a leash on this. Have adults sell, but leave my children alone! Anybody want to buy a &%#@ magazine subscription?

Evan's fingernails grow so fast I have to trim them every few days, so why does he still look bald?

Why won't my children wear their coats? Don't they know that when Mom is cold, everybody is cold?

A discount drug card might help the TennCare insured who have more scripts than TennCare will allow, but it doesn't really help the uninsured. If an opportunity ever allowed the possibility of getting insurance, we can't risk any pre-existing conditions interfering with obtaining coverage, so we try not to go to the doctor. The irony, of course, is that if we went to the doctor enough to be uninsurable, we might qualify for TennCare, but probably not.

It's hard to get out of bed on a frigid morning when Molly is napping on your feet. She is better than a Bewitched bedwarmer.

I think 7 p.m. is a perfectly acceptable bedtime. Don't you? I think Ben & Jerry's in bed is a perfectly acceptable dinner. Don't you? I think men speak before their brains process the thought. Don't you? I think I need a break. Don't you?

When the children have been with a friend for too long, they start bickering and acting like over-tired toddlers. This is the fourth day without school and they are now acting like over-tired grumpies with each other. Contrary to my brother's beliefs, there is a "quota on fun" and we have passed it. Time to go back to school.

and how was YOUR weekend? 

Lone gray hair down there

Ugly harbinger of death

I will trim and tweeze

Finally! 

Weekend - When "we can" transport the children to and from activities. Today is karate, movies, mall, grocery and a sleepover day.

If Sarah tells me she's bo-red one more time, I think I will scream. Really.

I think I need an exorcist to get rid of this cold.

The last time we were supposed to have snow, we got nothing. That's what I expect this time, too.

My brother's office looks like a fun place to work. My brother is in the background watching the young musicians.

Those aren't Christmas lights on the house. They are "winter lights".

I have felt pretty indifferent about taking Amy to see the new Curious George movie. After watching the music video ten zillion times, I think I would like to take her just to hear the rest of the soundtrack. I do have a Blingo ticket I've been saving for X-Men 3.

Way to go Rufus! Your personality came shining through tonight.

If I could do just one selfish and indulgent thing in my life, it would be to be in attendance at Westminster just once before I die.

I liked the Sheltie but the Old English Sheepdog is a great looking dog. Lots of maintenance and grooming, though I suspect the new Shaggy Dog movie will make this dog and Bearded Collies popular.

The herding group has won Westminster the least, but they are my favorites. They are active, intelligent, social and loyal family members.

The Deerhound shape and stride remind me of Molly. Sometimes the judges are intimidating. The hound judge looked sincerely happy to be there. Nice. A shoe manufacturer with attractive but comfortable women's shoes would make a fortune backstage at Westminster. The men all look appropriately formal, but some of the women look just clueless.

The Golden Retriever is one of my favorite breeds. They are wonderful with children. I would like to have seen more personality from the winner of the sporting group though.

"Mommy, I tooted." "OK. Maybe I should call you Tootie." "No. I'm Little Toot. And Daddy is Big Toot."

Good - A sweet Valentine blog from Doug. Bad - Blogger being down most of the day. Good - Deep sleep that leaves a puddle of drool on my pillow. Bad - Waking up to find my nose crusted and stuck to the pillowcase. Good - Valentine candy from grandparents. Bad - The three-year-old feeding candy to the baby. Good - The baby's chocolate covered grin.

OMG, please don't joke about 101 Dalmations at a dog show. There is nothing worse than people buying a dog because of a movie or television show. You have to research the breed and consider how it would fit in your family.

Yes! It would be great to see a Dalmation finally win but just getting to the finals is a triumph.

I miss Joe Garagiola. Fred Willard is funny, but Mr.Garagiola was a comforting and familiar part of the show.

Nope, I'm just not a Pug fan.

I love them all, but the toy group is probably my least favorite. Westminster loves them though. Actually, I think they love poodles more than anything. I just wish poodles got more dignified hairstyles.

How could your heart not melt when you watched Rufus prance around that floor. Those little paws are just too sweet.

When the judge moved the Rottweiler to the front, that dog knew he was the winner. Beautiful dog!

I've mentioned before that my extended family is heavily armed and very big on hunting. I've been on several of the hunting excursions, including quail hunting. Not one person in my family or any of their friends has ever accidently shot anyone. However, based on my family's experiences, Mr.Cheney should never be allowed to drive a riding lawnmower. He would be deadly on one of those.

School is closed today but our roads are clear. Noah is already bo-o-red. Sarah is online plotting a trip to the movies with her friends. Tommy is annoyed that I won't let him spend the entire day playing warcraft online. Evan won't nap with all the noise and Doug can't work with all the chaos. I think I will get dressed and drag everyone somewhere so Doug can have some peace. Maybe we'll go pound on the school doors. "Let us in!"

He is the reason all my children run screaming whenever they hear "that" music. The tickle monster is always right behind them. Da-dum. Da-dum. Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-DA-DA-DA-DA!

Forget "long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days." It's impossible to share a good kiss with your husband when your nose is completely stuffed. smooch gasp smack gasp

As much fun as it is to say "I'm blogging that," it is more fun to hold back on something totally bloggable. "Shall I go blog you-know-what?" I am soooo evil.

Where is our snow?!?

Weekends. The time when most bloggers are too busy to blog while I desperately look for something interesting to read so I can hide from laundry. There should be a webring just for weekend bloggers.

We need milk. 

I think that I might wear my jammies inside out tonight. Everybody do a snow dance!

"Do you know who is on the stage Sarah?" "That's Gorillaz. B's brother likes them." "No, I mean the woman in the, umm, leotard." "Nope." "That's Madonna." "Madonna who?"

When the weather man mentions even the possibility of snow, the children wear their jammies inside out and nobody sleeps. "Is it snowing yet?" "No! Please quit asking and go to sleep now Cathy."

Socks should have snaps so they stay together when not being worn.

Handkerchiefs - utilitarian or yuck?

We need more chocolate. 

We have two cars. One is a Jeep with no roof. Not very useful when you have 5 children and not very pleasant in the winter, so it is parked at the bottom of the driveway. The other car is a wagon with no heat. Stinky steam/smoke pours into the car when it is running, so the three working windows are kept rolled down. I think I'd prefer to just stay home.

Winter 

Knoxville is surrounded by mountains that protect it from most weather harshness, but I can't go a whole winter without snow, so we drove to the mountains today. We went tubing and then made it to the pass into the higher elevations of the Smokies just as they opened it. The drive through the mountains, all frozen white was incredibly gorgeous. The boys even put their Nintendos down long enough to look out the windows and stare at the beauty. "This is screensaver quality!"

Michael Silence and his family stopped by Ben & Jerry's today to make a few denim squares for a Four Freedoms Quilt. If you haven't met Michael yet, you don't know that, unlike other reporters I have met, he is a soft spoken and genteel gentleman. I was thrilled to be able to chat with real grown-ups with careers but bit my tongue when I wanted to babble like an drooling groupie to his wife, "Tell me more about the real world puh-leeze."

This week has been exhausting. Thank goodness we don't cause chaos everywhere we go. I am looking forward to making a noisy mess at Ben & Jerry's tomorrow.

Why do all the children's shows look like they were created by marketing departments?

Do you know a better way to store headbands? 

I am planning to be at Ben & Jerry's next to Fresh Market this Saturday from about 3 until 4 and I'll have some plain denim squares with me (hint hint) if anyone wants to drop by and decorate one or a dozen.

Amy has been staying dry in the daytime for months now, so I decided it was time for the potty chair to disappear. I was sick to death of cleaning it out a thousand times a day and Evan is too mobile to risk having the little seat down at his level. Yesterday Amy realized the chair was missing. "Where's my potty?!? I want it NOW!" I ignored her screams and calmly explained that it was gone and blah blah blah. The little terrorist walked to the hallway, squatted and peed. "I TOLD you I want my potty chair!"

I am almost finished with my Noah's John Adams project and pretty close on his Bunker Hill project. He needs more help with math and then I have to do Sarah has a project, poster and report for math. I need a break from it all but there isn't time.

Since tonight is a repeat, I will ask old questions about LOST. Does Charlie have the sickness that Danielle referred to OR is Locke drugging Charlie? Is the mole Libby or Locke? Could Jack and Desmond be real brothers? Did Locke have the same spinal injury as Jack's wife? 

I have two brothers. One of them signs his comments "the better brother". Is the better brother the one who high-fived a doorway so hard he broke his hand or the one who locked the keys in the car with the engine running?

Our car is built like a hair dryer. Cheaper to replace than repair. Every time it has a problem (and it has LOTS of them), the answer is the same, "Parts will cost $75 but labor will cost $400." When a mechanic that you know and trust will only do temporary fixes because it's not worth putting that much money and effort into it, it's time to give up on it. I would like to be zen and trust that this will work out, but I get stuck on accepting uncertainty.